Spark!

Every year I become electrified starting right around this time.

Woe to static I zap and get zapped by everybody/thing I come in contact with. My hair flares out as if I’m possessed.

Wearing synthetic clothing is a bad news. But a lot of times I have no choice. My fleece sweater is way warmer than cotton. I’m slightly allergic to wool, so that’s not an option for me. And my work uniform is… I don’t know what it is, but definitely made from some form of petroleum.

What do you call that chain-like thing some people put on their cars to release static electricity? Is something like that sold for humans??

In case somebody’s contemplating a random act of kindness, getting me one of those would be highly recommended.