Created for His Pleasure - Revelation 4:11

I have been reading Jan Karon’s The Mitford Series/Father Tim Novels. In one of the volumes, a character asks the protagonist, Father Tim, the meaning of one’s existence. In reply, the clergy quotes Revelation 4:11 in KJV:

“Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created”...

Previously, whenever I heard the expression “created for God’s pleasure”, it felt to me as though such creatures were meant to be almost like toy-things or slave servants just to do the Creator’s bidding, though the notion does not jive with the benevolent character of God.

I can’t pinpoint what it was about the novel that helped me to see this scripture passage in a different light, (perhaps it was the way Fr. Tim relates himself with God throughout the story), but this time I was able to perceive the profound sense of God’s joy and desire for our companionship, the sheer pleasure in His created beings.

It so happened that I had a sick child on hand, which also might have helped my heart, as well as my mind, to understand: even when my little boy is spurting gunk from every pore and cranky to boot, it is my pleasure to be in his presence and take care of him. And we are His children, whom He promised never to let go, even if a mother forgets her own! Amazing!!

So His pleasure lies not in our usefulness to Him but in the inherent value He has lovingly placed in us. What's more, in the newness of life in Christ, we may be restored to fulfill the true purpose of our being; to give glory, honor, and power to Him who created us. Again and again I realize; it’s not about me, but all about Him...

There is so much of the scripture that I read askew from my broken prospective of God. I pray that the Lord will restore my sight by His mercy, so I may see the truth and live in the fullness of His grace and glory.

“When your word goes forth it gives light;it gives understanding to the simple” Psalm 119:130

Dear Lord Jesus.

Give me strength to fight like you did.

To overcome might with gentleness;
pride with meekness;
hate with forgiveness;

To love to give to set free.

Oh Lord, create in me your heart for those who are oppressed and captive.
So that I may find you in your distressing disguise.

For you have given me the Spirit;
not to enslave me of fear but to make me your child.

I ask this in your name, Jesus, trusting in your promise.

Amen.

The News of Spring

A few Sundays ago, Ken spoke from the book of Ruth with a theme of spring. Oh-so-typical for the early April in Michigan, it was a dark and snowy morning. Though I understood the natural course of seasonal progress, it just felt unlikely that the long coming spring was about to bloom into light and warmth.

In the land of Moab Naomi lost her love and joy. She was highly distressed and quite understandably so;

“Don’t call me Naomi,” she told them. “Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. I went away full, but the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The Lord has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.” (Ruth 1:20)

I was taken aback by her open accusation against the Almighty. There are numerous passages of pretty bad things happening to people, when they offended the Old Testament God. Surely Naomi would’ve been very familiar with them, but I guess she was passed the point of caring. Her life couldn’t get much worse anyway, right?

The sense of angry apathy in her speech is strangely familiar. I have been in there, we have all been in there, in the wasteland of Moabite winter; where self-pity is our friend and nothing we have can solace the disappointment of what we lost or didn’t get.

Naomi continued to live in that place even after she returned to her home land. But Ken pointed out that the chapter does not end with Naomi’s tragic monologue.

So Naomi Returned from Moab accompanied by Ruth the Moabitess, her daughter-in-law, arriving in Bethlehem as the barley harvest was beginning. (1:22)

“As the barley harvest was beginning”… I have always read passed this sentence without much thought. However to those who are familiar with the land and customs of Palestine, it is an emphatic term of spring, a definite turn of events.

As if to glide over Naomi’s spiel, the narrator of the story closes the chapter with the declaration of a new season and a new beginning. And in this barley field, the spring of promise land encroached Naomi’s Moabite winter within; through an unlikely agent, Ruth the Moabitess. The book of Ruth is essentially the record of how this gentile woman became a part of the direct blood line of David, from which the Messiah was later born.

In the time of utter despair God did not leave Naomi alone. Though she did not seem to have taken much comfort from it, the relationship she had with Ruth was incredible. The scheme God was orchestrating around Naomi’s life was too grand to be perceived.

Much like Naomi, I in my spiritual blindness often failed to recognize the season around me. Not knowing what He has in store, I become joyless in a situation that does not appear to be going my way. I could even be telling the solution God has sent to me, “Go back to where you came from. What good can I do for you? What good can you possibly do for me?”

Good news is, the spring is here, weather I can comprehend it or not.

Living in the Hear and Now

The counselor we got for our premarital counseling gave us an interesting insight on psychological traumas.

Below is my understanding of what our counselor explained to us, so the detail might not be totally accurate. It’s going to look like a re-cap on Psych 101…

When a human being experiences extreme physical or emotional stress, it goes through Amygdule, which is located in the central part of our brains and functions a little bit like a gateway. This almond looking organ controls fear and sets off “fight or flight (or paralysis)” responses in the face of danger.

What was interesting to me is that when fear hits, Amygdule shuts off the access to frontal cortex, where cognitive functions such as impulse control, judgment, problem solving initiation, and planning ability reside (this is also where the information about our identity is stored). As a result, the brain goes into an almost primitive self preservation mode. It reacts, rather than responds, to the situation without tapping into who we are or how we might handle the issue according to our values and personalities. This is why people tend to exhibit uncharacteristic behaviors under stress.

Instead of making decisions based on the potential future impact and our principals, Amygdule in crisis mode employs the more readily accessible past tactics, tracing how we have dealt with similar circumstances before (likely in a dysfunctional way).

So in a sense we are living in the past when stress and fear takes over… Lost in the waves of panic and anxiety, we sink deeper into brokenness by desperately reacting to a desperate situation.

But there are ways to reprogram our brains to gain access to the frontal cortex, even when traumatic reaction is triggered, says our counselor. Breathing deeply from the stomach, as opposed to short panting from the chest, helps. Our faith in God, really helps.

“Remember He is with you in this present moment. Ask Him to hold you and make you stand. He will help you to reclaim who you are. He will stand between you and your fear to protect you.”

As I imagined God filling the room right there and then, tears welled up in my eyes.

People who have gone through childhood traumas often have difficulty trusting God. Yet every time we experience His presence in the midst of a trouble, a cerebral pathway is rewired to its wholeness. Yes, it is a long and cumbersome process. But our brains are receptive to restoration by its wonderful design.

Dear God, help me to live in the presence. Set me free from the fear of the past and anxiety for the future. I want to experience you, right here and right now.

Weed Among Wheat

In the parable of the kingdom of heaven from Matthew 13:24-30, “the weed” sown by the enemy among the wheat is sometimes translated as “Tares”.

I just heard an intriguing exposition on this passage.

Tares is a strain of plant that grows in the Middle East. It looks similar to wheat when first sprouting, but as the time passes the difference between the two becomes apparent. Tares grows faster than wheat and it causes vomiting and diarrhea if ingested.

The roots of tares have a tendency to grab onto the roots of the plants around them. So if someone tries to pull out a tares, the surrounding plants will be uprooted with it. Knowing this quirk about the plant helps to understand why the farmer in the parable told his workers to leave them alone until the harvest time.

The point of the exposition was this: Our inclination towards imperfections in our lives is to remove them ASAP. But sometimes God tells us to leave certain flaws in our lives alone for the time being. In these instances we just need to trust that He knows what He’s doing and will take care of both wheat and tares in due time.

On a similar note I came across a blog titled “Hiding Place”, and below is a paragraph from it (translated by me):

“Sometimes trusting the Lord and resting in His presence is the best tactic we can use. In many cases leaving our enemies alone can lead to killing them by starvation. At the same time doing nothing can incite their power and give them an opportunity to strike. Therefore the best course of action is to hide in God, our shelter, and be still. God Himself will help us and protect us.”

By focusing on a few tares, I can lose sight of the field full of good seeds God has planted in my life. Also the gentle Farmer wants to preserve wheat that grows around tares. Injuries, betrayals, heartaches and sicknesses. Good things do grow around those not-so-good things and they often come in an inseparable package.

Ah, but dear Lord my natural instinct at the sight of harm is to fight or flight. This approach of seeming inaction on my part is painfully counterintuitive to me.

So Father, help me not to react out of fear or impatience, but to quietly rest in your presence and know, that You are God.

White Beast

I’m sure we all have had dreams in which we are chased by something or somebody. A recurring “chaser” in my dreams since the childhood is a white beast.

It resembles an oversized wolf but with way more fur and body mass.

When I was younger I hardly ever saw the beast itself in my dreams. Maybe I’d get a glimpse of white fury in a flash or two. But I knew with a certainty that it was after me. Its presence was so palpable I could almost hear its padded footsteps with claws rasping on the ground, and feel the wet and hot breath on my heels. So I run, stumbling, fear gripping my heart. I would wonder how much longer I can keep running.

I haven’t out run the beast.

Within the last couple of years I had maybe 3 encounters with the beast. In those dreams I have captured the full appearance of the beast. It looks just as vicious as it has ever been, but slightly smaller (perhaps because I’m bigger now?). Interestingly I’m less frightened by the actual confrontation with the beast than the image of it chasing me.

The beast is still very much beyond my power to vanquish, though. Last night I was fighting it with a spear. Before I could finish it or it could finish me, I woke up. Even in the dream, I remember, I was in awe for the fact that I’m taking on something (though it didn’t look like I could overpower it) that used to paralyze me by its sheer presence in the distance.

At this rate, perhaps I’d be able to slay the beast in the near future once and for all? Or perhaps it isn’t meant to be defeated by my own strength…

JOY

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2

When I saw this verse, I used to assumed the “joy” that was set before Jesus meant the glory of sitting down at the right hand of the throne of God.

This notion had made the verse seems irrelevant to me because frankly, the concept of the reward in heaven is not tangible enough to get me through disappointments and hardships in life.

I recently came across a friend’s blog that ruminated on this verse. A question was posed; “What was the joy like, which compelled Jesus to go so far as to the cross?” and it got me reevaluating my understanding of the verse.

Maybe the joy set before Jesus was not the glory but seeing what the cross was to achieve – salvation of the lost and deliverance of the captive? The glory was a bi-product or the added bonus and not the objective of His suffering…

To me this view is more in line with the image of God, who is love, and it helped my heart to open up to the verse.

There is only so much suffering a person can bear for his or her own sake. Human nature is intrinsically self-centered by the fall, but God seems to have planted in us the ability to disregard a significant amount of pain for the sake of others.

This is where the verse becomes relevant to me. When I witness God bringing healing and restoration in people’s lives, the joy that bursts in my heart is so powerful it blows away all my concerns and pain (at least for a couple hours or so). I don't think it was in my nature to be that moved by other people's affair, so it must be the doing of Christ within. Talk about pure grace. In fact, I think that’s the only thing that can kick my sorry butt out of the gloom I’ve been in for a while now.

Perhaps I’m finally learning not just in my head but also in my heart that I’d actually be a happier person when I live the “Seek ye first the kingdom of God” life. Living for myself, seeking happiness in who-knows-what, ain’t working for me no more.

So I echo the prayer from the Divine Hours below. Well my motivation for wanting to live for God and His kingdom is still fully self-serving, since I want that for my very own delight. But if that will keep me from going down the odious path of self-pity, then hey, that works for me.

Grant that I Lord, may not be anxious about earthly things, but love things heavenly, and even now, while I am placed among things that are passing away, hold fast to those that shall endure; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit. One God for ever and ever, Amen.